Michelle Chalfant | The Adult Chair | 296 – How Self-Validation Will Change Your Life
podcasts-template-default,single,single-podcasts,postid-22193,single-format-standard,theme-hudsonwp-,edgt-core-1.2,inf_infusionsoft,woocommerce-no-js,ajax_fade,page_not_loaded,,hudson-ver-2.2, vertical_menu_with_scroll,woocommerce_installed,blog_installed,wpb-js-composer js-comp-ver-6.5.0,vc_responsive

296 – How Self-Validation Will Change Your Life

In my 25 years of practicing as a therapist and holistic life coach, I found that there was one common root cause behind many of the issues my clients were facing: low self-worth. From codependency to difficulty with decisions or boundaries, not having a strong connection with the inner self was often the driving force behind these challenges.


Most of us have a tendency to look outside of ourselves for worth and validation, and building up a strong sense of who we are on the inside takes practice. One of the simplest and most powerful places to start is with self-validation.


Self-validation is when we notice who we are – our actions, thoughts and feelings – and we affirm ourselves. It’s not bragging or comparing ourselves to others but rather speaking truth to ourselves and cheering ourselves on…which not only builds up our sense of self-worth but also leads to healthier relationships as we stop looking to others to validate us.


In this episode, I’m sharing more about the power of self-validation and simple steps for how you can begin a practice of doing this every day. It literally takes seconds to do, and over time, it will change your life! 


Listen to discover:


  • What self-validation is and why it’s important
  • The connection between self-validation and self-worth
  • What self-validation looks like in real life
  • Steps to starting a practice of self-validation
  • The difference between self-validation and narcissism or bragging


No one can make us feel or believe something we don’t believe about ourselves. So, if we don’t have a sense of our own self-worth, no amount of validation from others is going to give us what we need. It’s an endless cycle of approval-seeking that never fills us up. 


That’s why we have to lay a foundation of self-worth and believe in our own goodness so that when others validate us, we can actually let it land and show up more authentically – as the true self that we know and love.


“Self-validation starts a domino effect to help heal all of these things because self-validation starts to build self-worth.” – Michelle Chalfant


“Self-validation is when we notice what we’re doing or thinking or feeling and we acknowledge it, we own it and then we give ourselves a pat on the back about it.” – Michelle Chalfant


“If you want healthy relationships, start out by self-validating. It is unhealthy for us to rely on external validation.” – Michelle Chalfant


“Self-validation is the healthy way to feel good about self.” – Michelle Chalfant


“When you add that validation that takes seconds, my internal self gets built up, my self-worth gets built up, my sense of self becomes a little bit more positive.” – Michelle Chalfant


“It’s your job to share with others what you need.” – Michelle Chalfant





The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification (Doors Close January 31!)






The Adult Chair® Website



The Adult Chair® Membership



The Adult Chair® Workshop 



The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification



TAC Circles®






Instagram: @michelle.chalfant

Search Podcasts