239 – Guilt from The Adult Chair

It can be really tough to talk about guilt. No one wants to focus on a mistake they’ve made, and it can be especially hard to own and admit when we’ve done something wrong if we’re wracked with shame and beating up on ourselves. 

But guilt can be a very healthy emotion when it comes from The Adult Chair — when it’s a path to healing rather than self-shaming. In this episode, I walk through the ways guilt serves us and how it can be a tool to let us know when we need to repair relationships. I’m also breaking down how you can tell when guilt is irrational or unnecessary and how to release guilt once you’ve made amends.

Listen to discover:

• The difference between shame and guilt
• When guilt is healthy and when it is unhealthy
• Steps for working through guilt
• How to (truly) apologize and repair a relationship
• How to stop ruminating on guilt and move forward
• Recognizing false guilt

I see so many people who struggle with unhealthy guilt, whether they feel guilty for something they didn’t do or can’t forgive themselves when they’ve done something wrong…especially during the holidays and this pandemic. Guilt should never be all-consuming like this…and it doesn’t have to be when you:

1. Own it
2. Apologize
3. Take action and
4. Let it go from your healthy Adult Chair

“There’s a big difference between guilt and shame. People often fall into shame and label it as guilt.” – Michelle Chalfant

“It’s a choice to continue to beat up on self.” – Michelle Chalfant

“It’s ok if other people are upset and disappointed if you’re making a choice to protect yourself and your family.” – Michelle Chalfant